The bloody and river-scorching New Yorko-Clevelo War has finally ended. And, just as so many wars before it have been, the whole unpleasantness was resolved with the meting out of free threatre tickets.
You may remember that a New York bigwig theatre advertising exec named
Hyancinth von Applebritches Nancy Coyne was quoted as saying, while talking about supposedly-snobby New York theatre audiences, "we hate tourists from Cleveland." Well the Mistake by the Lake got all up in arms in their polite Midwestern way and the battle broke out. We helped stoke the flames!
But, yes, now it's been resolved. The musical Chicago, which is not about Cleveland, is now offering Free Ticket for Clevelanders days in January (Monday, Tuesday, Thursday), in which anyone with a valid state ID proving their Cleveburg residency can get a free-ass ticket. That's a good deal, eh! Also Coyne is going on Cleveland radio (which is two cows listening to two cans connected by string) to give out more free tickets to other shows in January and February.
"I'm sorry we were mean to you. Come see our shows for free. Pay hundreds of kabillions of your Cleveland Space Bucks to come out here and stay in hotels, sure. But the singin' and dancin' is gratis." Ah well! It seems to have worked anyway. I mean, I'm not having buckeyes lobbed at me while I walk down the street anymore.
You hear that Petraeus? Maybe there's a good production of Jesus Christ Superstar comin' up that everyone might enjoy.
Oh. Oh, right.