Jeremy Piven Finds That Partying With Models Can Cure Mercury Poisoning

An affliction as unusual as Jeremy Piven's sushi poisoning demands a treatment that's equally unorthodox. And so it is that Piven has begun a rigorous medical trial to find models he wants to (therapeutically) bang.

Good news, though! The NY Daily News reports that he may have settled on a healing agent that shows promise: model/waitress/SUNY dropout Ashley Chontos. Piven met the 23-year-old at a late-night birthday party for Britney Spears that he bravely attended despite crippling, play-quitting fatigue. Still, the actor is open to exploring other remedies:

Despite Piven's obvious interest, an insider tells us that the ex-Choice Model was actually runnerup for the actor's affections. "Jeremy met several girls at Britney's birthday party," the source says. "He was really interested in a model who happens to be Ashley's direct competition, but he was so insistent in his pursuit that he freaked her out. She stopped returning his calls, so he settled for Ashley in the long run."

Says another source: "He's a numbers boy. He gathers up girls' numbers when he's out. That night, he sent out a mass text to everyone he'd met, saying, 'Come to my room - whoever responds first gets me for the night.'"

An intriguing therapy indeed—instead of realizing that he is an actor who plays the agent of Vincent Chase on Entourage, Piven thinks he is Vincent Chase on Entourage. Whether his role-playing session will lift his spirits and better his constitution remains to be seen, though we have a feeling that Piven will become miraculously healed right around the time HBO issues a start date for Entourage Season Six.