Judge Throws Out Attempted Murder Charge for 'Benjamin Button' Shooter

While today brought good news for crime-accused Hollywood celebrities, how did Hollywood-adjacent folk heroes like Benjamin Button shooter James Cialella fare?

As you may recall, the heavily browscaped 29-year-old Iraq War veteran attained instant legend status after shooting a too-talkative audience member during a screening of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (Cialella was armed and ready during the previous day's matinee of Delgo, but found no fellow patrons). This week, a judge threw out an attempted murder charge and ordered Cialella held for trial on aggravated assault, reckless endangerment and related charges. Victim Woffard Lomax Jr. also revealed new details about the incident:

Lomax, 31, told the judge he was at the movie with his girlfriend and her three teenagers, enjoying the film and laughing, when a man in front of him _ not Cialella _ told him to quiet down.

"We can't laugh?" Lomax recalled asking.

A second man threw popcorn at the family, and a brawl ensued. Lomax said he was fighting with the first man when the second man pulled out a gun and fired, striking him in the left arm.

A defense lawyer argued that Cialella was being choked and punched as he tried to break up the fight and fired in self-defense.

"He's a marksman," lawyer Greg Pagano said. "If he wanted to shoot to kill, he would have."

Still, we can't help but feel sympathetic to Cialella, and we have a brand-new, charitable suggestion for David Spade: instead of donating rifles to the police, of all people, why not resolve to put a Glock in the hands of every usher at the Arclight?