Glossy Book of Lies Will Save Bush LegacyS

The White House has released an awesome book called "Highlights of Accomplishment and Results" from "The Administration of President George W. Bush." Let's page through it!

This presumably final report of the Bush legacy project, which brought Bush superstars Karl Rove and Karen Hughes back to the White House, is a 50-page book (warning: pdf) detailing every misleading argument you will hear coming from Bush mouthpieces from now until the end of time. Eventually enough of the talking points will be repeated enough times that they will become accepted truths, and Bush will be seen as having been Not That Bad, probably by 2010 or so.

The best part of the book, besides the awesome and heroic pictures, is the "Did You Know?" boxes, which are full of great trivia about faith-based programs and so on. Like: did you know that the Afghan economy has doubled since 2001? We're not sure if that's counting opium production or not (if not, then we're forced to point out that double zero is still zero).

Also how about that economy? You know, the last thing Bush fucked up on his way out of office? Well DID YOU KNOW that Bush cut taxes? Then there is a photo of Bush hammering a nail.

But the most important section is, obviously, "STOOD ON PRINCIPLE & SHOWED THE WAY AHEAD." This one has a photo of Bush hugging a baby. Also he is very proud of how he failed to privatize Social Security.

The book finished with the "100 things Americans may not know about the Bush administration record." This is actually a non-numbered list of talking points summarizing the talking points from the first half of the book. The last achievement: "Directed unprecedented preparations for a smooth presidential transition," because the thing he should be proudest of, of course, is that his disastrous presidency led us to Hope Savior Barack Obama. God bless everything!