If a TSA agent cries after making you take off your shoes or throw away expensive makeup, will you still be mad at him? ABC's Homeland Security USA sought an answer last night.
Yes, that is an actual television program that exists now. It's about how safe—and yet horribly, horribly imperiled, every minute—you are right now. Which is to say, it's a reality program about airport security staff and all the myriad crazy things (human skulls!) they have to clear through their checkpoints. It's produced by the guy who gave us Big Brother along with, you guessed it, the Department of Homeland Security. It's one of Bush's very last parting gifts to his beloved, cowering populace! (I mean but seriously though, why now? And it raises the bigger question, at least to my political savvy-impoverished mind, what is Obama going to do with Homeland Security? It seems like such a Bushy relic.)
Anywayyyy, last night was the pilot episode and after forty minutes or so of airport security stuff, the show reached distractedly for your heartstrings while dragging some broken fellow named Officer Robert Collins on to cry about how he wants to protect your kids and his kids and everybody's kids from the unimaginable terror that is just barely kept at bay by his magic wand.