The Smuggest Thing That Has Ever Happened

Barack Obama's inauguration will be a blessed, historic event. Also, a catalyst for liberal self-caricature, starting with $4 latte-sippers watching the ceremonies in coastal Starbucks cafes. On which network?

The answer is obvious:

The inauguration coverage by the cable news channel MSNBC will be projected onto movie theater screens in 21 cities next Tuesday. The channel is also planning to announce a partnership with Starbucks to simulcast its coverage in 650 of the company’s stores.

Which stores? The ones in New York, San Francisco and Seattle, where MSNBC is legal, where the president-elect's fans are fervent, where people can still afford Venti Peppermint White Chocolate Mochas, and where it is understood that some Change should be left in the jar by the register.

The liberal cable news network's Keith Olbermann, Chris Matthews and Joe Scarborough will probably spend the entire time yelling at and viciously mocking one another, so be sure to claim your table as soon as your local Starbucks opens, so you can enjoy that for many hours, in a caffeinated and highly-focused state.