Wall Street big shots have their own exclusive fratty Friar-like club called "Kappa Beta Phi" that met last week for its annual—and allegedly humorous—to-do. Let us list some of the unfunny jokes that occurred:
- The name "Kappa Beta Phi" is "Phi Beta Kappa," but, wackily, backwards. Not funny.
- "'Today, the FBI put out a warning that Al Qaeda was planning an attack to cripple the U.S. economy,' inductee Martin Gruss joked later in the evening. 'I've got news for them, Congress has already done that.'"
- "'There's Wilbur Ross over there,' Mr. Gruss said at one point, referring to the member who recently became the society's 'Grand Loaf,' one of Kappa Beta Phi's four offices. 'Doesn't he look like a visitor from another planet? That's the reason brothers and sisters shouldn't marry.'" Oh-for-two, Mr. Gruss.
- "There was at least one attempt at rap, by Mr. Hill, who was quickly jeered offstage. Rockefeller's Mr. McDonald tried to sing a version of 'Joshua Fought the Battle of Jericho,' renamed 'Treasury Fought the Battle of Lehman Bro.' and met a similar fate." At least they jeer correctly.
- "Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson, a former Goldman Sachs CEO who is not a member, also made it into the Grinch tune: 'Where's the TARP money, Mr. Hank? Did any of it fall through the cracks? You let Lehman go under but not your beloved Goldman Sachs.'"