Oh look, Peaches Geldof just happened to bathe topless and to hold various awkward poses while a photographer snapped very clear pictures of her tattoos. The trainwreck hipster heiress must need money.
Let's figure out the tats. They'll blow your mind. Through pointlessness.
- Doves = LOVE. Not to be confused with marrying a dude for a green card.
- Playing cards = good luck. Like being born to the right person.
- Ace of spades = being an OUTSIDER. Like living in Williamsburg, with "Spanish gangsters," who eat bagels.
- Unicorn eating chain of daisies = ???. WTF, because everything else about Peaches is deep and meaningful, you know?
- Angel wings = "because girls see themselves as little angels."
- "Disappear Here" = Her style magazine, and a Less Than Zero reference. So probably a coke tat.
- Those four lines from Nick Cave's Into My Arms = somehow related to ex Frederick Macpherson.
- "An open book with a bizarre hangman's noose hanging over the page" = to symbolize Peaches being "owned" by a metaphor-challenged ex.
- "Ex Valentine" = some other boring ex story.
- "Max Drummey" and a rosary = ditto.
Peaches Geldof is a walking anti-tattoo public service announcement. Hopefully she'll similarly help kill off celebrity columns, vanity media projects and living in New York while named Peaches Geldof.