The position of Secretary of Commerce is apparently the most difficult one to fill in the whole administration! It requires someone super-symbolic, like a Mexican-American former primary rival or a real-life Republican! But the job is also easy and unimportant enough that it is actually Bill Richardson's consolation prize for not getting something important, because he's a bit of a buffoon, and the Republican can be any old schmuck, even someone who once voted to dissolve the Department of Commerce.
But now we have this guy, Gary Locke, who used to be the Governor of Washington. He was America's first and only Chinese-American governor! He's also a good friend of the Clintons! What terrible secrets will we learn about this seemingly boring and safe choice, probably by the end of the week? Maybe he forgot to pay taxes on income from that celebrity chimp he owns that bit Rahm Emanuel's finger off in a rage, or something? Or maybe it'll turn out that "Washington State" actually belongs to Canada, making him INELIGIBLE.