Frito-Lay Snacks Are the Sassy, Sympathetic Friend You Need, Ladies!S

Snacks: are you purchasing a sufficient percentage of yours from the Frito-Lay brand? If you're a woman, the answer is probably no. But don't worry, ladies; neuromarketing targeting your hippocampus will change that soon.

Why are women so stupid that they buy far fewer Frito-Lay chips and crap than men? It's because of their stupid emotions. Which can be turned against them!

Ms. Nykoliation began by researching how women's brains compared with men's, so the firm could adjust the marketing accordingly. Her research suggested that the communication center in women's brains was more developed, leading her to infer that women could process ads with more complexity and more pieces of information...

And research Ms. Nykoliation read linked the anterior cingulate cortex, which processes decision-making and was larger in women, to feelings of guilt. (Experts differ on how directly functions or feelings are associated with various parts of the brain.) Ms. Nykoliation then asked NeuroFocus to review her assumptions and, as Juniper Park developed ads, to test the ads to verify that women liked them.

So Frito-Lay is putting pictures of natural ingredients and shit on their feminine-friendly packaging, and throwing in some ad copy that girls like, like this: "'These things are the best invention since the push-up bra,' one woman says. The other, admiring her bra-enhanced chest, responds, 'I wouldn't go that far.'"

Hahahahahaha! Frito-Lay brand totally knows what women like, which is 'Sex and the City' knockoffs and snacks that they can pretend go with a diet. There's no fighting a corporation that knows you this well, ladies. [NYT]