Place Your Top Chef Finale Bets Here

Hey you Bravo loving fools! It's JDS. In a mere eightish hours, the finale of the fifth season of Top Chef will descend like a pestilence. Meanwhile, enjoy this photograph which reveals the following:

  • Dismissed contestant Fabio is clearly having a grand sexual moment with Padma Lakshmi. Probably while this photograph was being taken and probably under the table.
  • Toby Young, white shithead from Planet Suck, knows this to be true and feels peevish about it and thusly will think of a biting bon mot like, "In the words of the Italianate gentleman on my starboard side, this is Top Chef. Not Top Footsie."

What is not clear is who will win. I am pretty sure it will be Carla who is coming on quite strong. It could be Stefan but he might be too much like Hung, that is too cerebral for the viewers. But that's just one incredibly informed opinion. I'm open to others. Gawker odds: Carla 2:1. Stefan 4:1. Hosea: 19:1. John: 3:16.

Be sure to tune in to Mr. HIppity's orgiastic commenter ball at 9pm and my recap tomorrow.