Barack Obama's barber "Zariff" has no last name and is suddenly in all the papers explaining that the president has GENUINE gray hair after just 44 days in office. Why?
Zariff cut Obama's hair for 17 years. He still does, about every two weeks, so the president has presumably flown him out from Chicago to DC. He's not going to start giving rogue interviews without permission.
Best guess: The hair is supposed to underline how hard Obama is working to SAVE US ALL from global economic collapse while Drug Pastor Rush Limbaugh leads the Republicans in a prayer for the president to fail.
This hair thing will spread widely throughout the media and get talked about by readers because it isn't actually directly about the depressing depression at all, it's one step removed. It's about hair, something superficial and fun that everyone understands from extensive first hand experience, unlike say debt securitization or TALF.
The benefits of this narrative will definitely outweigh the inevitable counter "news" that mysterious "Zariff" is our Muslim president's Hezbollah handler (even though that's probably true!).