Andrea Peyser Haunted by Visions of Long, Smooth Female LegsS

Andrea Peyser is always on the sex tip, yall! The NYP attack columnist seems to lash out in print as a way to repress her natural urges for, say, some legs that just don't stop.

What important public event is Andrea chronicling with her trademark blend of bile (extra green!) today? Why it's the lady with the world's longest legs shaving her legs, in public, for charity and PR or something. Andrea used her free will to select this event to cover, we presume. It's okay for adults to pursue their prurient interests, Andrea.

No, weirdo. The water she used was not for sale.

Andrea checked!

As the world watched, agape, Svetlana Pankratova, whom the Guinness Book of World Records has crowned the leggiest dame on the planet - her gams alone measure barely 11 inches shorter than the top of my head - deforested her lower limbs at the Kiehl's store in Greenwich Village...

It was to make me queasy.

That tingling feeling is not queasiness, Andrea. It's not important what Col Allan thinks; it's just important to be honest with yourself, Andrea. These feelings are perfectly normal. Although we don't know what message you were sending with this final sentence:

She never bled.

That vampire shit is extra kinky. [NYP]