Joe the Plumber Attacks Michael Steele

It's like a MadLib, isn't it? [Marginal unappealing GOP figurehead] criticized [unelected/unelectable GOP media mouthpiece] for [insane thing].

See, new RNC chairman Michael Steele masked a reasonable and quite necessary strategy—attracting youths and minorities to the GOP—in the stupidest language possible. But while people like us make fun of him for the language (and for being, generally, a buffoon), people like Joe "The Plumber" The Plumber are actually offended and frightened by the idea of a Republican party that isn't solely controlled by and for "regular people" or "real Americans" which means "aging white men." Like Joe the Plumber.

"Unfortunately we have a chairman up there who wants to redefine conservatism; he wants to make it hip hop, put it in a new package and sell it."

"You can't sell principles; either you have them or you don't," he added, to applause from the audience of 800 people.

Yeah! Your statement almost makes sense but doesn't really! Whoo! You can't put conservative principles in a new package and sell them, you have to have them, or not! Dammit! No colored music!

Later this month, Bristol Pail will criticize Jonathan Krohn for being a total dweeb, and then Ann Coulter will actually shoot David Brooks in the face, for the same reason.