So Nasser Kazeminy is this rich guy in Minnesota who owns an oil company in Texas. Now a former executive of that company is explaining, in court, how Kazeminy bribed soon-to-be-former Senator Norm Coleman.
See, Kazeminy, he kept flying Norm around on his private jet, and hilariously he bought him a bunch of suits at Neiman Marcus. Norm is a broke hobo Senator who lives in a basement apartment paid for by the same GOP bigwig who payed for Sarah Palin's shopping spree at... the Minneapolis Neiman Marcus! Wheels within wheels, just like in the wonderful film Knowing.
Back to Kazeminy: just giving money to Norm, straight-up, was thought to be a little gauche, so Kazeminy had his oil-drilling company, Deep Marine, give money to this other company that Norm's wife Laurie worked for sometimes. The money never made it to Mrs. Coleman (a failed actress who lives in California, and not, like, with Norm in Minnesota or the DC basement or anything) but it's obvious to everyone involved that it was supposed to.
This former CFO says Kazeminy kept giving money to Norm because he felt bad that we don't pay our Senators enough.
According to the transcript, Thomas was asked, "In that conversation that you had with Mr. Kazeminy, did he tell you, quote, United States senators don't make shit, close quote? Or words to that effect?"
Thomas answered: "Yes, sir.''
So there is your complicated Senatorial bribery illegal gifting lawsuit scandal story, for today. Next we are going to post funny pictures of a lady having sex with presidents, so just relax.