Gawker 
Apr 16, 2009 2:01 PM
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Pro football commentator extraordinaire John Madden has announced his retirement after more than four decades in football, first as an NFL coach and later as an announcer for ABC, CBS, and Fox. He's quite a lovable figure, but never before has one man become so famous for saying so many obvious, uninsightful things. Perhaps that is what America needed, though. Good luck in your future bus travels and video game making, Madden, you hoagie-eating platitude spouter.
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