Grinning Pirate Is the Toast of NYC

Abdiwali Abdiqadir Muse is the biggest young star to hit New York since the inimitable Lady Gaga! He's a teen Somali pirate; he's already famous; and he's about to be demonized for our collective amusement!

Muse, who weighs, I'm guessing, about 120 pounds, and is the walking incarnation of evil, came into NYC last night surrounded by a dozen federal agents, and smiled for the cameras, which is a perfectly normal reaction for a teenager from Somalia, I guess, and may end up being a smooth PR move for him as well. He's a human, you see!

The Post only dubbed him "Jolly Roger," rather than, say, "Laughing Satan From the Land of Darkness," which is a fair indication that his press could be not all that bad. Muse is reportedly facing life in prison. Unless Barack Obama saves him:

''I appeal to President Obama to pardon my teenager; I request him to release my son or at least allow me to see him and be with him during the trial,'' [Muse's mother] Adar Abdirahman Hassan said in a telephone interview with The Associated Press from her home in Galkayo town in Somalia.

Now is the time when Hussein Obama shows his true pirate colors! The ideal outcome of this case would be that Muse gets sympathetic press, a short sentence, and comes out smiling and vowing to change his ways, then becomes a man-about-town here in NYC, fawned over by downtown club kids and UWS intelligentsia alike. Worst case scenario: the Post loses its sense of bemusement. If so, watch out for the lynch mobs.

[Also: the AP finds out the kid's actual name while the tabloids go with the court documents' spelling of "Abduhl Wal-i-Musi," which reeks suspiciously of "Hick American sounding out a foreign language."]