Money Replaced by Gold, Barter, Crime

The Way We Live Now: Blingy. The new dynasty of the American auto (one day) is over! Nations and companies alike are falling. The barter system is returning. Grab the gold and run!

Chrysler is bankrupt. Is it possible that we jumped the gun earlier this week by declaring the new revival of the US auto industry? It's really too early to tell.

What is for sure: Germany is fucked. At least we know Mercedes isn't doing so hot, as a consolation prize. Because we, the broke Americans, can't buy them! Burn. Pat yourself on the back, America: the German economy is shrinking by 6%.

Which is not so bad if you choose to compare it to Starbucks, which saw its profit shrink by 77%. That's what happens when you decide to close your Astor Place store, Starbucks. Live with it.

Or, just say fuck everything. The black market is back! "Cash" money is worthless, so we must honor the woman who walked out of her employer, a jewelry manufacturer, with 500 pounds of gold in her purse over six years. This woman has already grasped the type of "retraining" that the average worker will need in this new economy.

And so has the NYPD, I guess, because they used an illegal sweatshop to manufacture their uniforms. Ha. Fuckin cops.