Gays Are Sad Millionaires and Gold-Diggers Too

I don't know if y'all homos watch Millionaire Matchmaker on Bravo, but something big is happening on the season finale. Something very big, and very gay.

Millionaire Matchmaker is: A horrible materialistic show in which Patti Stanger sets ugly rich nerds up with ugly young gold-diggers. Supposedly Patti is using ancient yenta arts, but really she's just throwing a barrel of horrible people into a darkened room and if a match is made, terrif.

This season she introduced her first millionairess—an actual lady looking for love!—and that was a big awesome deal except it didn't really work out because gender roles don't work that way (well, not on cheap reality TV, at least.) But now there's an even bigger shakeup: she's having a GAY millionaire on the show! Like a man what does other men and has at least one million clams in his bank account. So she's herding up some young desperate things who will preen and pout in the hopes of landing sugar daddy and Patti will nod her helmet head and we'll all feel good about the world.

Except it will be terrible, because the very concept of this show—nothing simpler than Love Is Bought—is so repugnantly awful, especially in this economic climate, especially in foreclosure happy and credit crunched southern California. But at least it's progress for the gays. Y'know. One step forward. (A million steps back.)