Oh, the rebellious minions of Rupert Murdoch! The Wall Street Journal has issued precious new rules for how its reporters and editors must conduct themselves on social networks. They are, of course, being ignored.

The WSJ's Twitterati Break All the Rules

Rule:

Don't recruit friends or family to promote or defend your work.

Tech editor Julia Angwin retweets fans of her new book, Stealing MySpace.

The WSJ's Twitterati Break All the Rules

Rule:

Never misrepresent yourself using a false name when you're acting on behalf of your Dow Jones publication or service.

Gadget columnist Katie Boehret may use her ink-dot portrait, but she goes by the highly suspicious "kabster728" on Twitter.

The WSJ's Twitterati Break All the Rules

Rule:

When soliciting information from readers and interview subjects you must identify yourself as a reporter for the Journal, Newswires or MarketWatch and be tonally neutral in your questions.

Let's hope writer Mary Pilon was being rhetorical. If not, she really botched this one!

The WSJ's Twitterati Break All the Rules

Rule:

Base all comments posted in your role as a Dow Jones employee in the facts, drawing from and citing your reporting when appropriate. Sharing your personal opinions, as well as expressing partisan political views, whether on Dow Jones sites or on the larger Web, could open us to criticism that we have biases and could make a reporter ineligible to cover topics in the future for Dow Jones.

Amy Schatz reveals a career-killing bias against Uhura on Star Trek.

The WSJ's Twitterati Break All the Rules

Rule:

Don't disparage the work of colleagues or competitors or aggressively promote your coverage.

Who's going to tell WSJ.com life and style editor Marisa Wong to ease back on spamming Twitter with headlines?

The WSJ's Twitterati Break All the Rules

Rule:

Don't engage in any impolite dialogue with those who may challenge your work — no matter how rude or provocative they may seem.

Sharp-tongued AllThingsD mommyblogger Kara Swisher must have carved out an exemption in her contract on this one.

The WSJ's Twitterati Break All the Rules

Rule:

Business and pleasure should not be mixed on services like Twitter.

WSJ.com Europe editor Neil McIntosh reveals entirely too much about his outside interests.

Did you witness the media elite tweet something indiscreet (at the Journal or otherwise)? Please email us your favorite tweets — or send us more Twitter usernames.