Donald Trump's Magical Net Worth: 'My Own Feeling'

Learning Annex instructor Donald Trump has finally explained—under oath!—how he comes up with his own mysterious "net worth": first he does a "mental projection," then he's a billionaire, simple as that!

Trump's "testimony" came in a December 2007 deposition for his lawsuit against Tim O'Brien, who wrote a book saying Trump was worth far, far less than a billion dollars. Trump's response was to sue him for hundreds of millions of dollars so that he sure would have a billion after he won, yea! But seriously, Donald Trump just makes up everything he says about his own wealth:

"My net worth fluctuates, and it goes up and down with markets and with attitudes and with feelings, even my own feeling."

Financial projections are an emotional business! And these emotions are worth billions:

Mr. Trump said that his 2007 estimate of his net worth — over $4 billion — is "a very conservative number, in my opinion." He also said $6 billion is a good number, counting his brand value. (In the interview Sunday, he said he was worth $5 billion, not counting brand value.)

Hahahaha. Ha ha. Fun fact: Many established banks have lent this man money. What's your secret, Donald?

In the deposition, Mr. Trump is asked about the Bedminster, N.J. golf course, which financial statements showed had a net loss of $4.6 million in 2005. Has he ever done a financial analysis of his investment there?

"Yes, I've done mental projections," he said, figuring he'd eventually make $120 million. He never put them down on paper. "You don't really have to," he said.

[WSJ; Pic via]