Between the senseless death and nonstop racism, was this week a fun one or what? Also it's raining! Whee!
- This week on Fox: we asked how they maybe felt about the murder of a guy they kept calling a baby-killer with blood on his hands, which made Bill O'Reilly get mad at the leftists who dared wonder if perhaps repeatedly calling a man a remorseless evil killer might cause some nuts to believe that an assassination would be morally justified. Then the Lynchian dreamstate freaks of Fox & Friends got all confused about assplay. And, of course, Barack Obama is a Muslim and Rush Limbaugh will say anything for attention.
- This week on NBC: someone funny finally took over The Tonight Show, and someone not funny used the opportunity of an exclusive interview with the president to shill for his network's struggling entertainment division. Then a slicked-up Mrs. Iron Man lady was annoying on the new Tonight Show, and there's really nothing you can do about that. Except switch to Letterman, who is still, hands-down, the best interviewer on television—especially with annoying, stupid guests. Oh, and MSBC: Scarborough's on notice.
- And in the expanded NBC/Universal world? On Real Housewives of "Our Thing" there was dancing, and we asked asked Don Johnson for comment. And a sad show made us sad.
- Everyone at Vogue died of Swine Flu.
- Bruno is good for the gays, maybe. Better than Obama anyway (IF GAWKER EVER WROTE ANYTHING NEGATIVE ABOUT OBAMA I WOULD EAT MY HAT I WOULD WHAT A BUNCH OF LIBTARDS etc etc).
- Oh, there was something on MTV, too, about a little girl who went to a big town and made some friends but then her friends were mean to her and she got sad so she left. Now there is a list of shows you can watch while you wait for the real shows to come back. Sigh. Top Chef: Masters better be good or we're canceling our cable until football season.
- Bill Murray remains America's foremost hero.
- The Montauk Monster was actually the burned remains of print media.
- David Carradine died, tragically, and the fucking press thought it was too embarrassing to just report that it was due to sexual misadventure, deciding, instead, to allow everyone to believe that he committed suicide, because yeah, that's way more sensitive and not at all misleading. What the hell.
- Happy Terrorist Fist Jabiversary!
- Happy Funemployment!
- Bill Gates bought himself a ranch, James Franco failed to deliver the commencement at UCLA (because he got high), Barack Obama reached out to the Muslim world, and some Jews called him names.