If anyone can get the scoop on a fringe Kennedy family member's creepy porny obsession with JFK Jr., and a very specific description of said guy's child porn collection, it's the New York Post. They've done it! Kennedy creepiness ahead.

James Auchincloss (pictured, with munchkin), the 62 year-old half-brother of Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, is currently under investigation for child porn in Oregon. Police found a huge stash of pictures in his home, allegedly. A little local paper broke the story, and you could just feel the Post's palpable silence—heavy, building, breathy. Turns out they've been hard at work! They got three scoops in this nasty story.

1. Jackie Kennedy didn't want Auchincloss around JFK Jr., because he "showed an unusual obsession" for him when he was seven years old.

2. Auchincloss apologized to members of his church for the child porn thing, which sounds like a confession.

3. Details about his porn stash that you could have done without:

The pictures included shots of a young Ron Howard, Ricky Schroeder, Jonathan Taylor Thomas and Dylan and Cole Sprouse of "The Suite Life of Zack & Cody." There were also multimedia slideshows — set to rousing John Philip Sousa band marches — featuring the celeb pictures along with young boys at a local Fourth of July parade.

The New York Post is the early favorite for the 2009 Pulitzer Prize for PORN PERVS.