Stupid Europe always gets the best sex scandals. While we here in the USA are unable to even find three days worth of interesting material in a Senator's affair, France is four years into this S&M banker-"whore" murder case.

Cecile Brossard (who's been in jail four years already) has finally been convicted of murdering a rich French banker during a sex game in his "luxury flat in Geneva...littered with sex toys among expensive antiques." The whole thing is positively cinematic!

He was found in a skin-coloured latex suit pierced with four bullet wounds.
They had rowed over $1m, which Brossard had demanded as "proof of his love for her".
He had transferred the money but then had it blocked.
Brossard said she shot him after he told her: "One million dollars is a lot of money to pay for a whore."

Well then! All this after Europe already had the Mr. Gay UK Cannibal Sex Murder and the Austrian Fascist Leader's Gay Despair Death and the British Auto Racing Exec's Nazi Sex Tape Scandal, and we have to make do with ShamWow Guy.

We demand that Bernie Madoff have a Cannibal Sex Fight with Michael Bloomberg at once, for patriotism.