Hi there. Is everybody ready to talk about Chef Fight Club? After all, the first rule of Chef Fight Club is, "Everybody talks about Chef Fight Club," right?
Actually, the show isn't called Chef Fight Club; it's called Top Chef Masters. I'm just trying to make it sound a little more exciting. Also, I like the name Chef Fight Club better, so I'm gonna call it that tonight, if nobody minds. Good? Ok, so our group live blog of Chef Fight Club takes place in the comments section below, and the show starts at 10 Eastern on Bravo. Join us!
Here's a quick sampling of highlights from last week's episode of Chef Fight Club:
- Wylie Dufresne lost, but made up for it (in my book) by doing a lot of bleep-swearing — something that's been sorely lacking so far in this edition of the show.
- Elizabeth Falkner's boar was boring, which was bad — but also kind of funny. In fact, if she'd just pulled a Dufresne and pitched it to the judges as something "whimsical," they probably would have loved it. "Boring boar! How whimsical!"
- Graham Bowles failed to win the "vending machine amuse bouche" challenge, which surprised me, because he looks like a guy who knows his way around a snack machine.
- Suzanne Tracht — author of the bestseller, "Low-Metabolism Cooking" (no she isn't; I made that up) — won, and then told us: "I'm really excited." Apparently, she has to issue such verbal reports on her emotions because they don't register on her face.
Next, here are a few random highlights from the live-blog itself: Many commenters observed that host Kelly Choi, who calls herself a "foodie," looks like her diet could use a little more … well, food. Lizawithazee confessed to having once used Dr. Pepper in a salad dressing; Son of Spam noted that Dufresne resembles a James Bond villain, but couldn't remember which one. (I researched this: It's Mr. Kidd in Diamonds are Forever). Finally, Dot came up with two good nicknames for the winner — "The Undead Chef," and "Botox Face Lady" — so we'll have to vote on one of those before Tracht returns for the final round in four weeks.
As for tonight, I've watched the preview clips and offer these four "things to watch for" – one thing for each chef:
- Cindy Pawlcyn will reveal that she's started an all-female club whose members "go out and have organ meat." I'm not sure what that means. But whatever it means, I get the feeling that Gael Green would approve.
- Ludo Lefebvre will speak with a French accent that sounds (to my provincial ear, anyway) so pleasingly silly, I've already pre-nicknamed him "Pepe LePew."
- Rick Bayless, a Mexican chef who is also a gringo, will make a point of telling us he once visited Mexico as a child — apparently in an attempt to compensate for the fact that he's a Mexican chef who is also a gringo.
- Wilo Benet will … um, I got nothing. His name is an anagram for "bi teen owl." There.
Ok, it's nearly time to turn on Chef Fight Club (but remember that boring Bravo call it Top Chef Masters). So get ready to live-blog, and as you do, remember the second rule of Chef Fight Club: Everybody talks about Chef Fight Club. (That's actually the third rule too.)