College: where drunk kids are guinea pigs for social science. The funnest college-kid studies involve race, because they make everyone uncomfortable! Now comes a new study of interracial college roommates that proves we're all terrible. A racial breakdown:
If You Are White:
- Your black roommate makes you uncomfortable.
- You make your black roommate uncomfortable.
- You are far more likely to "break up" with your roommate if they're not white.
- You will not be affected academically by your roommate's race, because you care only about your own kind.
If You Are Black:
- You will do better academically if you have a white roommate, maybe in an effort to overcome your inferiority complex.
- Or maybe because you just don't like them and can get some work done.
- If you have a white roommate, your own "positive emotions" will decline.
If You Are Asian:
- Not only are you more racist than any other group, you also make those around you more racist. Scientific fact!
If You Are of a Race Other Than These:
- You are not as interesting to social scientists.