To stave off dementia! Yes, today the befuddled screech owls on Fox & Friends were discussing a study that states that those that stay married fend off Alzheimer's and dementia better than lonely divorcees. Brian Kilmeade took issue with this.

He didn't trust the study because it was done in Finland and Sweden and the Finns and the Swedes stay "pure" by only marrying each other. Whereas in America, everyone marries everyone (so long as they're white and their partner is white. Oh, and straight!) So therefore the study doesn't mean anything.

Suddenly the clouds parted and a thin ray of sunshine shone down on the pesky corn nut that is Gretchen Carlson—descendant of some Nordic "species", for sure—and she ably, if simply, mocked crazy dumb Kilmeade for being crazy and dumb and possibly suffering from dementia.

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It was a fine moment of morning television. Incidentally, after discussing this execrable show with my sister over seltzers at a picnic table in Rhode Island this weekend, she called me this morning and said "I tried watching Fox & Friends. I couldn't even get through five minutes. How can you possibly watch this every day?" And then I told her that I don't, that there are lovely video people who watch it for me and I cackled into the phone.

So, in short, thanks guys!