Your creepy Michael Jackson shrine is missing something, isn't it? You have that glove he threw "to you" at that concert 20 years ago. You have that lock of greasy hair. So what is it? We know! An "authorized" lithograph!

In the fine tradition of fake-collectible-monstrosities like the beautiful and respectful 9/11 plates, infomercial behemoths Telebrands has rolled out a once-in-a-lifetime stock of Michael Jackson "Thriller" lithographs for you to hang on your wall and proudly admire while you fluff your roses. Now that he's dead and all.

They're only $10! But because the demand is already so high, you can only buy two per order. So maybe you should apply for a few more credit cards and open a PO box or something so you can stock up, like you did on Beanie Babies. (Man, those things will never devalue).


The best part of the lithograph (and of the commercial)? That Michael's white suit is "as pure as his heart." Which is fancy infomercial speak for "buy this useless trinket that pays tacky tribute to someone who never molested anyone, please."