White House Press Corps doyenne Helen Thomas turned 89 today! Coincidentally, today is also the day Barack Obama's grandparents chose when they forged Obama's birth certificate 48 years ago. Obama gave her cupcakes!
She is old, so she doesn't know that cupcakes were over like six years ago. Tonight she's gonna drink a Cosmo!
Ha, just kidding. Helen Thomas has finished a day's work with a lowball of neat rye every night for the past 39 years and she's sure as shit not gonna stop now. (We assume.)
(Seriously, this is kind of adorable, everyone singing to Helen and all.)
The controversy will surely fade away. But the date in history will not. The birthday of President Obama, who incidentally shares the day with Queen Elizabeth II, has already been etched into the history of Hawaii and the nation.
Why should we believe this "Obama was born in Hawaii" nonsense when you don't even know that the Queen of England was born in April? (He might mean the late Queen Mum. Either way, that passage does not appear in the current version of the article. Because Obama's GOONS got to the Times.)