• By Pareene
    Sep 2, 2009 10:36 AM 2,306
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    #michaelbloomberg

    Kreepie Kats in "Mayor Bloomberg Kan Sukk 51% of My Pimpled Ass! And Jeter Kan Give Herpes to the Other 70% Of *IT*!!!"

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    Suicide Bomber Bird Attacks Mayor-for-Life

    Ever since Bloomberg and the Port Authority executed the adorable kittens of JFK's Happy Cat Camp, unchecked terror-birds have been waging war on the city of New York. And now they are going after Mayor Mike himself.

    Apparently a bird of some kind—possibly a goose or a starling or a Romulan Warbird—struck a Dassault 900EX carrying Bloomberg and others to Ted Kennedy's funeral. The plane landed safely and everyone was unharmed, but this was obviously just a warning.


    Send an email to Alex Pareene, the author of this post, at alexp@gawker.com.