There was the hope it was just a bad dream; a dystopian alternate reality gone terribly wrong. Tom Delay on Dancing With the Stars? It can't have come to that already? But it can. And here it is.

In the future, meaning later this afternoon, the state will immediately all criminals and public enemies grant starring roles on prime time television shows. Look forward soon to Charles Manson's season on Top Chef and Bernie Madoff's Rock of Love.

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