We mentioned this yesterday, but now we've got the video: A woman announced at a Texas Education Agency hearing yesterday that she is a 56-year-old virgin. She thought she was testifying at a hearing about sex education. She wasn't.
Former schoolteacher Deborah Parish (we're unsure on the spelling, since we got her name from the video), wanted to impress upon the agency that you can teach kids to get sexy without taking their clothes off, a proposition for which the fact that she had gone all her 56 years without "technically" having sex somehow serves as evidence. But before she could testify about all her gratifying fully clothed sexual experiences, the agency's members informed her that they were taking testimony on alcohol awareness—the sex ed stuff, when her virginal status would have been relevant, had all happened the day before. Read the agenda, virgin!
(Also on the agenda yesterday was a proposal to teach all Texans about Newt Gingrich in history class, but Parish didn't weigh in on that.)