Michael Jackson Had Unrequited Love for Hitler's Oral

The steaming pile of bullshit news surrounding late pop-star Michael Jackson continues to ooze out of every single one of society's pores. Today's tale? He loved Adolf Hitler. A lot!

According to British tab-rag The Sun, Jackson once told a friend — a rabbi! — Shmuley Boteach that Hitler, leader of the anti-Jews, was a genius orator. Which, despite the murderous dicator's message, is, sadly, accurate.

So said Jackson, according to Boteach's secretly recorded tapes:

Hitler was a genius orator. To make that many people turn and change and hate, he had to be a showman and he was.

In addition to praising Hitler's oratorical manipulation, Jackson also insisted that he could have cured the hate-filled Fuhrer. Which, we suppose, could be true: Hitler's entire genocidal concept would have been inverted after seeing a black man turned into a white woman.