Police in Everett, Wash., have broken up a prostitution ring operating out of an espresso stand. The baristas were the prostitutes. Welcome to the future.
From the Everett Daily Herald:
Five baristas are accused of engaging in prostitution at an Everett bikini espresso stand following a two-month undercover police investigation into complaints that the women were selling more than coffee.
Detectives say the women were charging up to $80 to strip down and flash customers while fixing lattes and mochas.
Investigators saw the women expose their crotches, lick whipped cream off their co-workers' private parts and pose naked for pictures inside the Grab-n-Go Espresso stand at 8015 Broadway, according to police reports obtained by The Herald on Wednesday.
Yes, it is called Grab-n-Go Espresso. The arrests were the result of a two-month undercover investigation into complaints about prostitution at "various bikini coffee stands around the Everett area." Two things of note: 1) There are bikini coffee stands, and 2) More than one of them have generated complaints that they are actually espresso stands/whorehouses. The detectives singled out the Grab-n-Go because it had generated the most complaints, and probably because the name was just too much.
More from the Herald:
An Everett detective took a city prosecutor to the stand to witness firsthand the activities of the baristas. During that visit, two women allegedly engaged in a "whipped cream show" in which they sprayed whipped cream on each other and licked it off.
Detectives say the women also charged customers to play "basketball" - a game in which customers were allowed to throw waded up money at the women, who caught the money in their underpants.
No word on whether the baristas' defense attorneys got their degrees from the Wal-Mart School of Law. We're gonna go grab a coffee now.
UPDATE: Apparently this is a thing. A commenter points us to a site that compiles all the "bikini baristas" coffee shops for your convenience. The latest addition: Sweet Cheeks Espresso in Des Moines, Wash.