This week was mostly rape and death. You know how it is.

Hippies, porn, and Tucker Max continued to ruin America. Roman Polanski didn't want to come back to America. Lots of people who should know better support him, though. Arianna Huffington flies around on jets. Don't crawl through the rape tunnel. Even though it's not real. Kids died. Silvio Berlusconi still thinks he's very funny. Naked men roam Williamsburg. Watch out for ass bombers. Also watch out for "American Police Force." Also watch out for Sarah Palin's wacko ghostwriter. Also watch The City. Hey, guess who doesn't like a gay person? Answer: Sean Hannity. Crazy recognize crazy. China still puts on a great party. Chicago, not so much. Hey, Kristen Chenoweth was on that Glee show! Larry Ellison is having a fit about something. Andrew Sullivan is high right now. There was a Conde Nast death contest. We loved zombies. David Letterman paid for his assistant's education, after he had an affair with her, obvs, and also after joking about lots of other people's affairs. Also she was on the show sometimes! Project Runway was kinda lame this week even though Kors was finally back. And there are some fun movies this weekend!

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