"Do you love chocolate almost as much as you love diamonds?" Yes, and??? Long have I waited to meet others like me: Wealthy lovers of gaudy jewels and cheap candy. If only...

Ah, good. There is a new consumer item that combines the unmistakable look of a Hershey's Kiss with the elegance of sterling silver, white gold, and diamonds. Perfect timing on the release date, too, macroeconomically speaking. You're all invited to the launch party. Especially you poors! You people love chocolate.
[UPDATE: Oh and a $3 million diamond-studded bra by Victoria's Secret? Seems unnecessary.]

Send an email to Hamilton Nolan, the author of this post, at Hamilton@gawker.com.