Las Vegas Stripper-Mobile Ends Its Reign of Sexy TerrorS

In the Unabridged Oxford Big Book of Terrible Ideas, the "stripper-mobile"—a truck carrying a Plexiglass box in which scantily clad women pole-danced—ranked just below eugenics. Obviously, it was a runaway success. So how was it stopped so quickly?

Last Wednesday, we wrote about the controversy surrounding the converted U-Haul truck, which had been cruising the Las Vegas Strip as an advertisement for Deja Vu Showgirls Nightclub. Well, on Friday, the Associated Press reported that the stripper-mobile has been pulled from the streets. Concerned citizens and city council members of Las Vegas, rejoice!

A Las Vegas strip club has agreed to stop an advertising promotion that involved hauling bikini-clad exotic dancers around in a truck with clear plastic sides.

Larry Beard, marketing director of Deja Vu Showgirls, said Friday that he's taking his lawyer's advice and parking the truck.

"We're going to respect the opinion of the folks that are against it," Beard told The Associated Press. "We're going to be good citizens and take it off the street."

Please note that the strip club owner's marketing director's name is "Beard."

Las Vegas Stripper-Mobile Ends Its Reign of Sexy TerrorS

Now that we've gotten that out of our system, it is interesting to compare and contrast Beard's ideas with more widely held notions of what it means to be a "good citizen." For the majority of Americans, being a good citizen consists of keeping up with the news, paying your taxes, voting, and raising children who aren't racist. Beard, however, adds a fourth and crucial component to good citizenship: Not sponsoring a highly dangerous and stupid gleaming sexy dancing lady wagon, no matter how much press it could get you. So if you are not doing this, reader, give yourself a pat on the back.

Amazingly, the conclusion of the stripper-mobile saga leaves everyone looking good: Beard is a "good citizen," the city of Las Vegas retains its title as "world's classiest city"—even city politicians get an image boost. Writes one commenter on the Las Vegas Sun website:

This shows that we have a higher class of County Commissioner these days. In the old days, the only objection some Commissioners would have had was that the girls weren't available for lap dances while they were out in the truck!

Progress!

Rest in Peace, Stripper-mobile. You will not be missed as much as the many people who would have been run over by drivers ogling you.