His car accident was revealed as a marital fight; then his philandering was exposed as serial, then as breathtakingly systematic. Now, with his mother-in-law hospitalized and his wife humiliated, Tiger Woods faces real family tragedy. How'd he get here?
Quickly, for starters. Not two weeks ago, Woods was a national icon with a wholesome reputation, a golfer who had broken down racial barriers and achieved enviable success, with a stunning supermodel wife and two children. Woods had plenty to be grateful for on Thanksgiving — or would have, if his dream hadn't been crumbling quickly around him. Here's how is comedown looked from the outside:
Week of Nov. 23, Tiger busted in press for cheating: The National Enquirer reports in its print edition that Woods has been having an affair with New York nightclub promoter and starfucker Rachel Uchitel, an affair that include racy text messages. It quotes Uchitel: "We're in love... I don't care about his wife!" It's later reported that Uchitel provided Tiger with other women.
Nov. 27, midnight-ish (Thanksgiving night), reconciliation attempt: Woods reportedly tells a friend his wife Elin had "gone ghetto" over the Enquirer story and that he needed to "run to Zales to get a 'Kobe Special'" — a giant diamond ring to patch things over.
Nov. 27, 2:25am, the big confusing fight: One of Woods' neighbors in Windermere, Fla. calls 911, saying Woods has crashed his Cadillac Escalade into a tree and is lying on the ground outside the vehicle. Woods is taken to the hospital in "serious condition" and released later that day.
Nov. 27, daytime, the innocent official line: Police release a report indicating Woods was drifting in and out of consciousness when they arrived at the scene. They tell the Orlando Sentinel that Elin heroically rescued him from the vehicle by bashing in the rear windows of the SUV and was hovering over Woods "frantic and upset" when police arrived.
Purported mistress Uchitel denies any affair with Woods.
Nov. 28, real news breaks: TMZ reports Elin had scratched up Tiger's face in an argument before he attempted to flee in his vehicle, and that Elin was attacking the SUV with a golf club as Woods attempted to escape.
Nov. 29, 'I'm sorry for something vague': Woods releases a statement that doesn't say much: "This situation is my fault... I'm human and I'm not perfect... This is a private matter and I want to keep it that way."
Dec. 1, mistress 2: Cocktail waitress Jaimee Grubbs, 24, tells Us Weekly that she, too, had an affair with Woods, over nearly three years. She is reportedly paid $150,000 for her story. And it's later reported she slept with actor George Clooney.
Dec. 2, mistress 3 (a maybe): Las Vegas nightclub marketer Kalike Moquin is named by Life & Style as another Woods woman, having "hooked up" with him multiple times at his Vegas hotel during an October weekend. Moquin declines to comment. It's later reported that she did not sleep with Tiger but was in fact pimping girls to him (see below).
Dec. 3, confession: Woods posts a more apologetic statement on his website, stating, "I have let my family down and I regret those transgressions with all of my heart."
Dec. 3, mistress 1 to admit affair: Uchitel schedules a press conference and is widely expected to admit an affair with Woods, recanting her original denial. The press conference is canceled amid rumors Woods' camp had paid her off.
Dec. 3, friend diss: Swedish golfer Jesper Parnevik, who introduced Tiger to Elin and employed Elin as a nanny, says, "I have lost all respect for him, primarily as a man and a father."
Dec. 5, mistress 4: Model Jamie Jungers tells UK's Sunday Mirror that she started a two-year affair with Woods while partying in Vegas. She was engaged to a devoted Woods fan at the time.
Dec. 6, mistress 5 and 6: Cori Rist (pictured) met Woods at the Manhattan nightclub Butter and, a year later, was still regularly hooking up with her, often in large hotel suites, according to the New York Daily News. Woods met Mindy Lawton (said the News of the World) in the decided less exclusive Perkins chain of bakery restaurants, before doing her in a church parking lot and naming her "rag doll."
Dec. 7, mistress 7: Porn star Holly Sampson won't deny an affair. Just in case you were wondering.
Dec. 7, mother in law visit: Elin's mother Barbro Holmberg, said to be in the Woods home at the time of Tiger and Elin's Thanksgiving-night fight, along with Tiger's own mom, is reportedly flying to the U.S. to be with her daughter.
Dec. 8, mother-in-law emergency: Holmberg is rushed to the hospital on "advanced life support."
Dec. 8, Tiger's madams revealed: Our sister site Deadspin reports that Uchitel's job was to line up women for Tiger at tournaments around the world. Numerous sources tell the sports blog that she may have slept with him, too, but that she was not primarily his mistress. Deadspin says Kalika Moquin played a similar role, and is not widely believed to have slept with Woods.
Dec. 9, Typhoid Tiger: It is noted in the business press that Tiger has not appeared in a TV commercial since Nov. 29, around the time his scandal bloomed, despite numerous endorsement contracts. Also, his Gatorade drink was cancelled. The brands involved insists this is just coincidental and nothing to do with any "scandal!"
Meanwhile, Rush Limbuagh, brings his typically top-shelf analytic skills to bear on the situation, blaming Woods for the fact that "the black frame of mind is terrible, they're depressed, they're down... They're all livid." Because Woods is sleeping with white women, you see.
Dec. 9, Uchitel sells out: OK! reveals it will soon publish an exclusive memoir with mistress 1 and alleged Tiger madam Rachel Uchitel. Everyone assumes the celebrity gossip rag is paying her, and that the deal explains why she canceled that press conference a week earlier.
More, we're sure, to come...