On Steven Seagal: Lawman, we see that Steve isn't just a Zen Kung-Fu Police Master, he also happens to be an excellent marksman. But is he an excellent teacher? Ehhh, not so much.

Steven was helping his colleague Alex train for his marksman test. Most of the time, Steven just showed off his sweet shooting skills by shooting the cotton off of a q-tip. Obviously necessary training for any police officer.

When it came down to the nitty gritty, where Alex wanted some real advice on how to kill people better, Steven resorted to the art of giving the most vague advice he could muster.


Here are some of Seteven's zen-shooting bon mots:

"Don't jerk the gun, just push the bullet out."

"Become one with the weapon—let it be an extension of yourself."

"Pow, just let it fly right where it's supposed to go."

Thanks, Steven! That should really help when a crazed meth addict pulls a knife on me in the street!

Also, as an aside, I think it's safe to finally admit Steven into the looks like an old lesbian club. Congratulations!