Former US Weekly editor Janice Min got a book deal to write From Mousewife to Momshell: The Rules and Celebrity Secrets for Being a Thinner, Younger, and Sexier Mom. What a great idea! We'd like to propose some entries.
1: Always dress like your daughter. You always want people to wonder whether you're actually SISTERS! [Photo of Taylor Momsen and her mom Collette: Getty.]
2: Introduce your children to fame as early as possible. For example, put the four-month-old baby in your lap while driving down the Pacific Coast Highway, instead of strapping it into a car seat. This will also remind everyone that you are footloose and fancy-free.
3: Hang out with the youth. This can easily be accomplished by taking your daughter to clubs. Also, tell everyone you were a former Rockette (they will think you are limber and athletic). When your older daughter seems to really go off the deep end, start hanging out with your younger daughter, whom everyone had hopes might be the "normal one."
4: Be honest about drug use. It's best if they learn that mommies make mistakes, too. After a hidden video camera catches you snorting coke at a club, act vaguely contrite when the news is splashed all over the tabloids. It will help if you don't lose too many of your lucrative modeling contracts.
5: Always make your ex-husband look bad: Leak the nasty voicemail your ex-husband left your 12-year-old daughter to TMZ and then breezily deny knowledge of it.
6: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. This can be accomplished by referring to Susan Boyle as "looking like a hairy arsehole."
[All photos via Getty]