Last night Hollywood's disgraceful frat boy older brother Charlie Sheen called the cops to say his Mercedes was stolen. At the same time, it's On-Star device called the po-po to say the car was wrecked. Only we know what happened.
It was found at the bottom of a cliff near his house in Sherman Oaks. No one was in the car and there was no evidence of anyone in the area nearby. Police are investigating, but it appears to be a mystery. In a Gawker exclusive, we have an inside source who has identified the person who stole the car. It was Toonces, the cat who can drive a car! We have notified local authorities and arrests are expected at any moment.