Must We Lose Our Tomatoes Before We Realize Democracy Is a Hollow Sham?

The Way We Live Now: Hoarding. We hoard tomatoes in a futile attempt to escape the looming tomato famine. We hoard pessimism. We hoard office knick-knicks because, hey, you can never have too many stress balls!

There is a tomato shortage in America. Some "experts" blame the weather; we blame the economy. You think if everyone pledged to pay one million dollars per tomato, there wouldn't be plenty of tomatoes? Smarten up and learn economics, "experts."

But no, here in the alleged Land of the Free, we're not free to pay a million dollars per tomato, because we are too poor to do so. As is Greece, where some historians believe democracy was born. Harmless coincidence, or bitter indictment of the "one man one vote" ethos?

Our role is not to make such judgments. Our role is simply to inform you in the gentlest possible tone that you are simply not pessimistic enough about your current economic situation. "Whatever you thought at the start of the year about the recovery," writes a man who is paid to write about the economy, "you probably need to be more pessimistic today."

More pessimistic. Is this the mood that our feel-good "democracy" hath wrought? Pessimism starts with a lack of tomato sauce and then spread throughout the rest of the economy and into our very souls. And then into Citigroup, which is holding a tchotchke yard sale right in its fancy Wall Street building or whatever? Is this, truly, tomorrow? Yes it is (tomorrow). Just as bad as today.
[Pic via]