Five Insightful Insights From the Hipster Grifter

Yesterday Kari Ferrell came here and answered like, 178 questions from you people. We've condensed that to five. Hipster Grifter CliffsNotes, below.

From ScottRaphael: "Hey Kari, great to finally have a direct line to you. My question, since the beginning, has always been "Why does anyone give a shit? Why would anyone care about your fake cancer even?" Seriously, not even the intense love / hate the blogoedron had for you, but I mean, just in general?"
KF: "I have no idea. Tell me if you find out."
We Say: Look within yourself, reader.

From DennyCrane: "Is women's prison anything like those movies they show on Cinemax late at night?"
KF: "Man, I wish."
We Say: Even a completely heterosexual woman would prefer it to be so.

From notfred: "I've read some of your stuff on that other web site, will you ever do some serious writing? I think you might actually be good. Oh, crap, watch the haters come out..."
KF: "I would consider it, but don't think I'm good enough to do so."
We Say: Everyone who says that is lying, for modesty!

From Mymoustache: "Why don't you go away?"
KF: "I've tried!"
We Say: See #1.

From Constantine Koutsoutis: "How much did it cost you to get Gawker to do this?"
KF: "My dignity."
We Say: The price was the same for all of us.