The Wall Street Journal has published the best story in, I'm guessing, its entire history, pertaining to monster manure gas bubbles threatening to explode all over the US heartland, with devastating effects.
Indiana dairy farmer Tony Goltstein has a big huge manure pond and you might be alarmed to learn about it. "Mr. Goltstein also must contend with bubbles the size of small houses that have sprouted from the pool of manure at his Union Go Dairy Farm. Some are 20 feet tall, inflated with the gas released by 21 million gallons of decomposing cow manure." Yes, these poop bubbles are "big enough to be seen in satellite photos," and yes, "neighbors worry that puncturing the bubbles could cause an explosion of manure and toxic gases." But:
Not to worry, said Mr. Goltstein as he stood at the edge of the manure pit, puffing on a cigarette and gazing at the bubbles glistening in the sun. "I have no fear popping them."
WSJ poop gas reporter Lauren Etter is our nominee for the Pooplitzer Prize. Rupert Murdoch, a one million dollar raise for Ms. Etter, posthaste.