Andrew Giuliani Loses Duke Golf Team Lawsuit

Human potato Andrew Giuliani, estranged son of America's Mayor Rudy, sued Duke university for kicking him off the golf team. Sad news, patriots: his lawsuit has been dismissed.

Who even knows what this lawsuit was about, besides the combination of entitlement and belligerence this doughy creep learned from his monster parents. But it is done now, and Andrew Giuliani lost.

(In 2007, Andrew said he could not participate in his father's presidential campaign because of his determination to becoming a professional golfer within three years. We note that only to say, hah.)