Guys, Michael Musto Needs a HugS

Beloved Village Voice gossip queen Michael Musto is having one of those days. He's just posted something on his VV blog about how he's too old to do this, too flabby for that, and basically doesn't fit in anywhere. Updated.

Some of his blue Monday complaints:

I'm too gay for the straight scene.

I'm too flabby for the gay scene.

Testify, La Musto.

I'm too downtown for uptown.

I'm too uptown for downtown.

Oh don't worry, those distinctions barely even mean anything anymore.

I'm too new school for print.

I'm too old school for web.

You are typing on the internet right now, probably! Not too old school.

I float through every scene, looking for connections while fully knowing my place is somewhere on the outskirts.

I'm everyone's second best friend.

Um, are you us? We will be your first best friend! We live across the street from your office practically. Call us. We'll ride a tandem bicycle together.

Update: Musto has now put up a post titled What's the Best Way to Kill Yourself? Could someone go check on him please?