Longtime Vogue editor André Leon Talley is the greatest thing about America's Next Top Model and his tenure on the judging table has gotten even more fabulously insane than ever. Also, a proposal for ALT.
Outfit: A red tent structure that belonged at an Ohio State graduation ceremony and clashed with Tyra's crimson jumper (is that all she's wearing this season?).
Accessory: The familiar tusk-on-a-chain, but with a new addition, a silver-tipped walking stick that he used to shake at the models like a belligerent headmaster or Debbie Allen in Fame.
Education: This week was a veritable French lesson with a class on the proper pronunciation of "double entendre" as well as the Gallic vocabulary word "poupette," which means doll.
Agreeableness: He stepped on a few of Tyra's lines and tried to take on a few of her duties, like dismissing each girl after assessing her picture and saying that the judges have reached a verdict. However, for the first time ever he acknowledged the guest judge, engaging in some crazy repeating call-and-response feedback loop around the words "high fashion" with modeling legend Pat Cleveland.
Uses of Dreckitude: One, and only in it's adjectival form "dreck" to describe a doll.
Grade: With the exception of the outfit, everything was perfect this week. His facial expressions are getting stranger, his antics wilder, and his unforgettable repetition of "high fashion" was perhaps the most amusing moment of the hour. (A-)
André: After weeks of doing your report card, I feel like a parent-teacher conference is in order. I am officially inviting you to lunch. We need to discuss your performance on the show, your past, your future, and the precise etymological history of "dreckitude." Name the time and the place, and I am there. I'll keep our readers all updated on the status of our inevitable educational summit.