Last night was one the Fly Girls' birthdays, so the girls did what they do best- they flew and partied like the sexy flight attendants they are!
Where did they fly you ask? Well, the only place a 'reality' show is apparently allowed to go - so with their arms up in the air they let it be known to the world with one might cry!
For some reason, which puzzles laypeople and cultural anthropologists alike, the Vegas cry is a sacred rite in a 'reality' show. It is just so wonderful to watch this show grow, like watching a baby bird stumble out of its nest and find its wings. Yet the fly girls were in for a surprise - they may have found their wings but they were flying straight into the dizzying lights of Las Vegas and things were about to get sloppy - a bird flying into an electrified sign sloppy.
Reality television has taught me that for some reason "anything that happens in Vegas stays in Vegas," so it was strange to watch it all on television here in New York. Since it also true that in Vegas that "anything goes," Nikole expressed her desire to end the night nude and everyone made their best O faces to show how shocked they were, as if it was an eerie foreshadowing of things to come. But how could that be? This is totally the real depictions of the exciting and glamorous lives of sexy, anachronistic flight attendants!
The girls decide to go and eat some food, but were slightly confused to find it lying open on a plate instead of sealed tightly in a plastic container. They manage to move past this oddity and begin to speak about their past Vegas experiences. Nikole told a story which involved some Viagra and a very long night which shocked some of the girls but seemed to turn on the rest. Then they proceeded to deliberate about the Strategic Arms Reduction Strategy, and contemplated its consequences on nuclear non-proliferation.
Of course they didn't - this show is created and produced by the men at Virgin airlines and they know women well. After dinner the ladies went dancing on stripper poles, and Nikole showed off all of her best moves.
The girls were having so much fun, until the fun stopped. See Nikole has a boyfriend, but then she started kissing a man who wasn't her boyfriend - but it was the DJ so technically it doesn't count (DJs can never really love a woman since they are so committed to the music). This didn't turn out to be a big deal anyway, because Tasha invited her "baby-daddy" along and this was supposed to be a flight-attendants only weekend.
The next morning everyone was really angry at Tasha for leaving the party early so the girls decided to use her as the sacrifice they are required to make to the reality television gods (they heard that really works for ratings). Fortunately, they deliberated and decided instead to let the two sinning reality cast members repent for their actions by repeating a sacred chant.
Fortunately most of the chant was censored because it really sucks to be sold some sort of ideology when you think you are innocently watching a reality show about the exciting lives of sexy flight attendants.