Upper East Side Poised on the Brink of ChaosS

You thought this whole Europe-blanketed-in-volcanic-ash thing was bad? Wait until the New York's doormen go on strike and the Upper East Side descends into madness, which will take place at midnight on April 21 unless a contract is signed.

Local 32BJ of the huge Service Employees International Union is threatening to strike unless the Realty Advisory Board accedes to some of their demands for better benefits and higher wages.

Matt Nerzig, a spokesman for Local 32BJ of the Service Employees International Union, said the two sides were still "far apart" on a new contract.

"Initial proposals from the real estate industry fall short of what working families need to make ends meet in one of the most expensive cities in the world," Nerzig said in an e-mailed statement. "Locking workers into a recession contract for the next several years when the economy and the industry are rebounding is not an option."

Meanwhile, the RAB is preparing its tenants for the worst:

Also on Thursday, the city's public advocate, Bill de Blasio, announced a Web site pooling online resources for tenants who could be affected by a citywide strike of apartment building workers.

In recent days, the RAB has been circulating guidelines to assist owners and agents on how to prepare buildings and tenants for a possible strike.

Yes: Brochures about how to open your own door.