We were too busy crying while watching Lost last night to even bother with The City. It's a good thing fictional freelancer Betsey Morgenstern was there to fill us in on all the details.
One Elle of a Girl
by Betsey Morgenstern
Assistant Accessories Editor, Steppin' Out Magazine
After the glitz, glamor, and champagne hangovers from fashion week have work off, all the biggest magazine's fashion editors go for meetings with the designers to look at their clothes up close and see if there's anything they want to borrow. These have been given the creative title of "editor's meetings" and they are usually at a PR office or other showroom that looks all nice and fancy even when all the clothes are crap.
The first "editor's meeting" I went to was for Whitney Eve. Full disclosure, I went to sleep-away camp with her sister Summer's, who was always like "do you want to go for a dip in the lake? Won't that give you a fresh feeling?" She was always right. Anyway, Whitney Eve had a rough runway show where one of the models was found passed out behind a vanity (no one has been able to prove that's my fault yet) so I was hoping that her presentation would be better.
It was. There were representatives from Teen Vogue, Redbook, Ladies' Home Journal, Black Beauty & Hair, and Cigar Aficionado there. That's quite a coup for Whitney Eve. I was getting ready to leave the presentation and the elevator bell rang. Out steps Olivia Palermo, famous socialite and an accessories editor of Elle who has been doing interviews with designers and stole my exclusive with Anna Sui at fashion week. I had to hear what she was going to tell Whitney, so I quickly ducked in the coat closet to listen.
It turns out that she just got a call from Roxy Carmichael Olin about going to the presentation, and she started off her conversation telling everyone how unprofessional it was. You know, Olivia is the most professional socialite with a very real job in the whole wide world, so she really knows what she is talking about. She asked where Roxy was and PR guru Kelly Cutrone said that she sent her out on assignment shooting a bunch of Jeremy Scott's clothes with naked subway photographer Zach Hymen. They were getting people off the street to get in their van, put on the designer clothes, and then pose for the camera. The last time I was ordered to get into a van and take off my clothes the driver was sent to prison. I still call him up from time to time, because he's really easy to find. Anyway, Roxy and this naked dude were taking pictures and it seemed like they were going to make a love connection. At least that's what Kelly said.
While hearing this, Olivia nosed through the collection. It was more like turning her nose up at the collection. She mentioned that she was doing interviews for Elle.com and that she was looking for young, hip designers. Kelly, of course said to do Whitney. Olivia met that idea with stony silence. All you could hear in the room was the metal on metal grating of hangers being slit along a garment rack. Olivia took a look book and then walked out, visibly peeved. She stopped in front of the elevator and called into a meeting at Elle headquarters.
"What did you think?" all the editors asked?
"It was horrible and all over the place and I'm not going to do anything about it!" Olivia declared.
"Why not?" everyone at Elle asked.
"Because I'm not. It's ugly and I hate her."
"Well, can we see the collection?"
"Sure," Olivia said. "There's a look book online."
She was waiting while they must have gone to look up the collection on the internet.
"We love it!" they declared. "We're going to put it on every page of the April issue. Also, we're going to use it to product place RueLaLa.com into this episode. We can't believe you thought this was ugly."
"You are wrong!" Olivia said in her mealy mouthed way. "You'll see when no one buys it. I am always right and no one else knows what they are doing. Everyone is so unprofessional!" She snapped her phone shut with a sharp thud and pushed the elevator button like eleven million times until it showed up 30 seconds later. "Ugh, you are so unprofessional," she said to the shiny chrome doors.
I stumbled out of the closet, knocking a bunch of hangers on the floor.
"Excuse me, can I help you?"
"Oh, yes. I wanted to do a market pull of that tie-dyed skirt with the buttons up the front."
"Sure. Isn't this piece great. Here you go," Whitney Eve said to me.
"Wait. What's this for?" Kelly snapped.
"We have a cover shoot with Tila Tequila coming up."
"Oh no," Kelly said. "There is no way I am letting that fucking skank get in your clothes. Give me that skirt back. Give it!"
She yanked it out of my hands and then threw me out on the street. How unprofessional!